It is finished – yes I think I know just what the poor fellow meant.
Contemplation is such an odd experience, especially for one in whom such words were written indelibly, in childhood.
Somehow the relinquishing of worldly concerns plays an ever more important role in my life. I have been working for weeks, months even, on a trading algorithm which turned out to be stillborn and somehow it does not seem to matter. Nothing much does, except to care for those around me, including my elderly and increasingly infirm parents in law.
The dear old boy has battled valiantly to care for his mildly potty wife and finally this week the toll seems to have been demanded. We shall rally round and give them the care they deserve.
It does all rather close in on you but in a way, the insights it brings are very cathartic.
I continue to toy with the big questions, quo vadis being the most poignant of those at this time. Those with faith have their own answer of course, those of us without are none too sure.
To have lived well, to have lead a life such that you can hold your head high at the end – that is perhaps the most treasured “possession” anyone could ask for. Pride would not be a word to use in this connection, but inner satisfaction in knowing you have done your best probably sums it up rather well.
Sadness is an inevitable part of life. We come around to all emotions at one stage or another and if we have any sense of self preservation, we manage to ditch those which wreak the greatest destruction.
But measured sadness – quiet melancholy for what is passed or passing, that is not an emotion to be discarded. It is a positive thing, a rich and full examination of life, a remembrance of past years and all that was good about them. If there was bad, it no longer seems to matter so much and at the end, it is the good that you remember.
The love, the gentle kindness of a good couple – these are things to be treasured and while they are still around we should tell them how much they mean to us.